Love...

Love...
I never want to talk about you...
I never want to think of you...
But the truth is...
I've missed you.

Love...
Whatever happened, you've been a crucial part of my life.
A part that I've always hoped to be better
But I know it can never be...
Everything happens with a reason...
Only He knows whats best.

Love...
Maybe this is the best for us...
Just so you know,
there is never one second
this heart did not wish
you are here with me.

Salam.

Exam month!

Alright!!! April is approaching... meaning its exam month! Been busy lately with work, assignment and work. Tomorrow will be going to a few bridal houses, looking at wedding packages, set up & dresses.

So start Monday, I would need to put some hours to exam preparation. With 1st paper starting on the 7th, I don't have a lot of time. Wishing for a break but so much to do so little time. April exam, May register, June op, August exam, Sept register, Sept wedding, Dec exam, January register, February wedding, April exam ... and the list goes...

Anyway, I still have some spa voucher and my monthly treatment. Its a few hours of escape I really look forward to. And my daily dose of CA family time :)

Okay readers, got to go now... Till next time, I'll leave you with this amazing rendition. Enjoy!

When two hearts unite...

Today marks a very special moment in my life... extra special for my dearest life...

I've set my heart on this angel since the day I knew of her existence. I had hoped that one day, this angel will bring light to our broken souls. When I got to know more about her, I knew I've made the right choice for my life. To me, she is truly an angel. A godsend. 

Went to her family's house with one thing in mind. I want her.... and I know my life will be happy with her. Amids jokes and laughter, I took out the ring I've brought. A booking fee... for a lifetime of blessings from Illahi. Alhamdulillah, everything went smoothly. The easiness shows how ArRahman ArRahim bless this intended union. As though it has been written in His books ... for my life and his angel.

For my life... my days are counted. One day I will not be around to share your joys and your sorrows. I present to you this angel, to wipe your tears when I'm gone, to care for you in your sickness, to laugh with you when you are happy. She is created for you from your ribs, to safeguard the most important thing in your life... your heart. Cherish her... love her... for Allah s.w.t has sent you the most precious gift anyone could ever ask for... your guardian angel... your soul mate. My life, forgive me as I have not been a perfect person. I've failed to show you the righteous path. I failed to guide you as I should have. My only hope is to redeem my wrongdoings through this angel, as I trust she would be able to fill the void I had left. 

For my angel... I give you my life. The most precious gift Allah s.w.t has given me. Care for him as you would care yourself. Forgive him for all his lacking as it is due to my ignorance, guide him to be a better person... a better khalifah. For I know, you are the guiding light of his soul.

I pray for your happiness... pray you'll be blessed always. Be a partner and a friend. A teacher and a student. Share knowledge and learn from each other. You will always be my life, the love of my life ... and my angel... you are my beautiful happiness. 

UNLIKE!!!

I like what you wrote ...

As it reminded me...

You are as you'll always be.

I like what you say...

It reflected the kind of person you are...

Although you deny it...

Action speaks louder than words.

I like your reaction...

It showed how immature and childish you can be...

And revealed your own stupidity...

I like how your mind is so set...

I'm sure you think you are one of His chosen ones...

That all your prayers will be answered...

No matter good or bad.

I like that you are so sure you think you know more about it...

Since you are brought up by those who are strict in religion...

As your friends are among the pious people...

And you yourself talk about performing the Umrah...

Talk about the blackness of other people's heart...

As though your heart is so pure.

But I UNLIKE when you placed the blame on Allah s.w.t...

Saying it's Him who moved your hands to type what you typed...

As though your words were His words.

And I UNLIKE the brains that Allah s.w.t has given to you...

How it is not used thoughtfully as how Allah s.w.t meant it to be...

How frustrations so quickly diminish all the greatness in you...

How anger so hotly envelop your soul...

And how easily you lose.

So, there is a Malay proverb...

Terlajak perahu boleh di undur, terlajak kata buruk padahnya.

As such, I'll refrain myself for saying anything more...

Since as you have mentioned that I'm stupid...

I would rather use my stupid brains for other stuff...

Then use it to think of you, about you...

'Cause it is VERY UNLIKELY that I'LL LIKE.

March is here!!!

3rd month in the year... What have I achieved so far?

1) I love my new job, new workplace and new friends.

Being a Secretary is something I enjoy very much. Most people would ask, why not being a BOSS instead? I've tried being a boss before. And failed miserably. I'm a creature of discipline but I can never discipline myself. I prefer to have guidelines to follow and my most important guideline will be the one set by Allah s.w.t.

My new workplace is dubbed as an old folks home. It's a law firm where no one willingly or forcibly resigns. You can work as long as you want. There is no retirement age. Those who resigns are people who wanted a career change or higher pay. And mostly those who did resign are young people who feels out of place in a snail paced environment. The building I work in offers prayer rooms and also daily talks during lunch time which I enjoy attending since day 1.

My new friends consists of both young and experienced people from different walks of life. Although there were some initial confusions on my status but all have been ironed out and I managed to keep the relationship cordial & work-related.

2) Getting better in scootering.

Reflecting back on my first post about Pinky, how scared and nervous I was then. Now I feel more comfortable and a little braver. Going 60-70 kmh mostly but still wobbly when it comes to sneaking in and out traffic. With headphones on, I'd keep to my left and enjoy Surah Yassin while commuting to & fro from work. I've even started having a pillion rider but only for short distances.

3) Reshuffling finances.

Getting my first full pay on the dot after 1 1/2 years is a blessing. This time, I will follow the steps taken by those in the Astro TV series (I forgot the name of the series) where this planner comes into the house, takes a look inside and outside the house, take a look at the participants expenses, gave them challenges and reward them USD5000 if they passed. No doubt no one will be giving me USD5000 if I passed, but I look forward to a better way of managing my finances. 1st step... CUT THE CREDIT CARD!

Now... If only I can write my assignments as well as I write my blog... Tsk... tsk... tsk!

Ciou!

Hey you!!!

Hope you have a great day today! Don't forget to thank your mom for bringing you to this world. I have a lot to say to you but I guess it's better if I kept my silence. Don't want to make matters worse. Anyway, hope you'll enjoy this!!!

I give up!!

I really don't know.... Is it written on my face somewhere that I'm desperate???? Truthfully, I'm not. I AM single but I'm NOT desperate at all. Someone once mentioned that I'm even experiencing menopause already at my age. (Psst.. I'm still in my 3 series okay - but too bad if the person who said that don't even know how to satisfy me) But I repeat... I AM NOT DESPERATE!!!

It is so hard to believe? There are other things in this world besides SEX. Why don't guys who wants to be friends with me think of anything else? Am I sending the wrong signals? I would agree if I did that 3 years back. But even with wearing hijab now, why do guys still think that I desperately need some kind of companion? I've got people telling me, what you don't see is what makes women in hijab sexier. Allahu Rabb!!!

Don't you guys understand what hijab is? Need I explain it in detail??? And these are all from married men!!! Don't you guys get enough at home??? I can understand if you don't or your wife have problems and you have 1 or no child at all. But if you have 5,6,7 children???? AND YOU SAY YOU DON'T GET ENOUGH???? Puhleeeseeeeee!!!!!!!

Ladies! I do not want to take your husbands. I have got enough problems in my hands already. I don't need any more. But if you don't even mind sharing your husbands with me... then tell your husbands that IF THEY CAN AFFORD TO BE FAIR, GET MARRIED! I'm not against polygamy... I don't even mind. But if the husbands are being supported by their wives, do you ladies think its fair???

Fairness doesn't mean emotional fairness. There is no emotional fairness! Even Rasulullah S.A.W is not emotionally fair between his wives. And Rasulullah S.A.W was only with Siti Khadijah r.a when she was alive because Siti Khadijah r.a supported him. Don't quote the sunnah when you are only looking at the polygamy issue but you don't practice his other sunnahs. But then who am I to quote on religion, I'm not perfect. I don't know much but I'm learning.

Again, for the love of Allah S.W.T... I AM NOT DESPERATE!!!!