Sounds of the heart....

Hiya bloggies....

Today is another new day. It has been a while since I wrote some serious stuff here. And so today... I'm sharing with you, what is in my mind...

I haven't slept all night, working on translating a script to be used for voice over dubbing today. As I work through the scenes, there were two scenes that made my tears fall.

1st scene: An ex-husband writing a birthday card to his ex-wife and placing it on a public board where people place cards or notes that couldn't be sent. His words were..

"Young-hee, I'm writing a birthday card I can't send you. Please remember only the happy and good times we had during our 10 years of marriage. Please forget the pain I've inflicted on you. It's true that I loved you and I'm being sincere when I say this. Please be happy. I think I can finally breathe if you're happy. On your birthday, May 28, 2009, Chul-soo."

Well you may think what so great/sad about these words..

I am in that lady's position. I was hurt and my marriage collapsed just after our 8th anniversary, on the 10th year since we've known each other. I've just had my birthday recently. And every year, even how rocky our relationship were... he never fails to wish me a happy birthday.. he remembered, to me that is what mattered most. And for those small things he did, I loved him ever so dearly. I would thought that after whatever happened between us, that he would forget but no. He set aside his ego and sent me a birthday text at 1201am on my birthday followed by a short message on my FB. Honestly I was touched, I cried but I couldn't make myself to forgive him, for what he has done.

2nd scene: The lady & a friend who had fell in love with her without her knowing was at a beach, holding a bottle ... like the story 'Message in a bottle' and they wrote a note, place it in the bottle, then throw it away, as though throwing all their problems away. And he said...

"Now your mission is to write everything you want to say and couldn't say to your husband on here. Then throw it into the ocean. As of tonight, you're getting rid all your troubles and start your life fresh. You're going to put the past behind you and plan for a bright future."

Easier said than done, but I did just that. Only I didn't have the chance to throw a message out to the sea. I just threw the imaginary letter out of my mind. With the help of a friend, who has been loving me since I was 16 and had never stop loving me till now, I planed a new life, a better life. Although, I might not be able to return the love this friend who selfishly and so thoughtlessly have for me, he has been the pillar of my strength for me to go through this hurt I'm having.

I thank Allah s.w.t for blessing me with my two most precious babies for whom I'm making these changes for, a great weirdo haphazard family who have been patience with all my ups & downs, and now a friend, who knows me better than I know myself. Thank you all for being there for me. I love all of you... always & forever.

Falling in love II ....

Okay.. okay!!! Enough with the teasing!

The person that I fell in love with is....

LEE SANG WOO



You can see why I'm crazy about him right????



I'm going gaga!!



Hmmm......

Falling in love....

Dearest blog...

I honestly, seriously head over heels with this person. I don't know when or how or why but he melt all barriers that I've build around my heart for MAN. How I wish I could touch him, hold him. My dreams were always about him, his smile, his wink, his laughter... I can only hear his voice in my head. Even when I write this... I'm smiling.. I'm outta my mind!!!!!!

Now listening to...

Maher Zain - For The Rest Of My Life (Lyrics)




When I listen to this song, my heart goes out to all the wives out there. Whether your life is happy or not, be thankful for what you've got. InsyaAllah, He will look out for you.

Now listening to...

Nyanyian rindu buat kekasih - Data

Tiada yang lain yang ku cinta, hanyalah padamu

Tiada yang lain yang ku rindu, hanyalah dirimu

Di kaulah permata yang bersinar

Di kala ku kesepian

Tiada yang lain yang kumahu, hanyalah kasihmu

Tiada yang lain yang kupuja, hanyalah dirimu

Tak mungkin aku berpaling

Berpaling mencari yang lain

Tak mungkin aku biarkan kau merana

Aku cinta kepadamu, sepenuh hati

Janganlah kau ragu kasih

Ragu padaku

Sejujur niatku niat bersama, selama-lamanya

Janganlah kau pergi kasih

Pergi dariku

Kunyanyikan lagu rindu, buatmu kekasih

Ku baca puisi syahdu, puisi kita...

Ku ingin kau di sampingku, untuk sama-sama

Melayarkan bahtera cinta yang terbina

Oh! Kekasih... dengarkanlah

Bila aku tersiksa, kaulah penawarnya

Bila kau terluka, akulah penyembuhnya

Kita sama-sama sudah jatuh hati, jatuh cinta...

Tiada yang lain yang ku cinta

Hanyalah padamu

Tiada yang lain yang ku cinta, hanyalah padamu

Tiada yang lain yang ku rindu, hanyalah dirimu

Di kaulah permata yang bersinar

Di kala ku kesepian

Tiada yang lain yang kumahu, hanyalah kasihmu

Tiada yang lain yang kupuja, hanyalah dirimu

Tak mungkin aku berpaling

Berpaling mencari yang lain

Tak mungkin aku biarkan kau merana.



Symphony's Let's Go Hunt 2010


Hello bloggers,

Never in my life I've joined a treasure hunt. I've always seen people going around doing it & thought it will be fun. So when the opportunity arises, I was aching to go but where would I find my team mates???

In a call centre where I worked before, I'm always known as the serious type. I do not waste my time chitchatting while I work simply because we have call targets to reach. So, in other words, I do not have many friends.

I've been quite close to this girl, Nana who treats me like a big sister. She would always wanted me to reserve a spot for her when I come to work early, which will be everyday. She will sit next to me and we do small talk when we have the time to. I liked the way she worked. She's intelligent but lack of opportunity.

So one fine day, we went into an elevator where the treasure hunt poster is hung.

NANA: K.Z let's join this! We will have so much fun just travelling to Penang.
K.Z: But who will want to go with us?

Mind you, when Nana became my close friend, she was looked down upon by the others for befriending a weirdo like me. But she doesn't care about that either. Bless you my dear!

NANA: We can ask.... to join us. But how about our off days? Will that be on the day? Schedule is not out yet.
K.Z: We'll go & get the form and apply for our off days to be on that day or swap the days.

But I never did went & collect the form. The conversation died there. There was so much to consider. For me, with my financial situation & car condition for long travel, it will not be possible.

The next day, Nana came to me...

NANA: K.Z, please fill up this form. We want you to be the driver.
K.Z: Huh? Who else is going?
NANA: Fara wants to go, and we are asking Kak Ang Ang to join us.

I almost fell off my chair rolling with laughter. This can't be happening. Fara & Ang Ang (BTW her real name is Anne but we call her Ang Ang because she likes to sing the Doremon song)wants to join in?

K.Z: Okay, I'll fill this up & you get the rest to fill up as well. We need to send this tomorrow if you girls are serious about it. And Ang Ang is not working today, how are you going to get her signature?
NANA: Leave it to me.

The next day, Nana passed the completed form to me. But instead of Ang Ang, it was Yaya. Nana told me Ang Ang has something else on that day and unable to join us.

I was concerned but yet excited. Concerned because I will be the driver for all these young girls, their life is in my hand, and my car???? Huh! I need to find a better car for the journey.

So the search for a car began. I would usually ask my dad to borrow his car for such journey. Unfortunately, the car's air-cond broke down & he has no means to fix it before the journey. My mom was in Australia at the time and I couldn't ask her.

While I searched for a car, Nana fell sick. She was on MC for a few days before the event. Now, I need to search for another teammate as back up if Nana couldn't make it. I coaxed my sister to standby. She was quite excited to go but finally Nana got the okay from her doctor to join & we also managed to resolve the off day issue by taking our annual leave.

The final hurdle was the car and when my mom came back, my sis told her about the event. Although she grumbled, my kind mother let me use her car...PHEW!!! (I'm sure it is a huge thing for her to do as she has a long standing phobia of me driving her car.. but that story is for another day)

And so we are off!!

Briefing Day..



I went to the briefing on my own. The rest of the team was on off day and Nana was still on MC.

Event Day...

Flag off: 7.38am





The journey was eventful. 27 questions, 6 pictures & 4 items to be solved for the treasure hunt. We spend so much time figuring out the 1st few questions, we were behind time. By noon, we reached Ipoh & everyone was hungry. Thank you to Yaya and her family, we had lunch at Yaya's family restaurant, Restoran Cili Hijau in Ipoh. Special dish for the day.. NASI AMBENG!!! (Yummy!)

In the end, we got so off from the scheduled timing, we decided to just enjoy the journey. Stopping by at questions spot, just to see if we can answer any of the questions in the quickest time possible. Finally, when we reached Juru Shell Station (which is the end point) we managed to reach on time - no late penalty, completed all the questions & solved all the picture but missing 1 item. (Honestly, we forgot about searching for the item till late) and mom.. if there is any police summons for speeding on that day, please forgive me. LOL!

The hotel

We were given rooms at Hydro Hotel, Batu Feringghi. Quite a nice place, but since I've been there years before and not much change has happened since then, I decided to abstain from exploring and catch some zzzz before dinner.



The Dinner...

The dinner was supposed to be retro style. Lesson learnt from previous themed dinner party, I decided not to spend money on following the theme & just wear what was collecting dust in my wardrobe.



The sad part is, this was the most boring dinner I have ever attended. Food was lousy, I hardly ate. The other girls left early out of boredom, they went out to the beach. I was too tired to join them after 8 hours of driving, I decided to stay back & wait for the results. At the end, we got 11 questions correct.. Not bad for 1st timers (Consoling myself only.. I hate losing actually). After dinner, I went back to the room and slept. (Yaya, sorry for the snoring! Ahaks!) I received a call from my aunt offering an interview for transcribing position. So I was to rush back to K.L as soon as possible the next day.

The breakfast

Woke up hungry like hell. Showered & pack all my belongings, I headed to the Coffee House. The display was abundant and I was spoilt for choice. And here I was...

1) Mushroom Omelette. 2) French Toast with Baked Beans and Bacon. 3) Toasted Croissant & Multigrain bread with cream cheese & butter. 4) Teo Chow Porridge. 5) Apple juice & coffee

He he he he....

And Yaya's jaws drop. (Although she did not mentioned anything.. so nice of her, surely she was surprised that I can eat so much) LOL!

The journey back...

We stop by at UITM Penang to meet with Nana's sister. She was badly homesick and I wanted to see Bella, but she was out for field work. Then I thought I saw someone I know at the field in front of the college. So I called his number. Sure enough, I saw him answered his phone. It was my sis's ex. Called him over & chatted for a while. It has been quite some time since I last saw him and he looked thin. He mentioned that he has been busy lately and drop a few kilograms. Hmmm...

Fara went back to Kulim with her family. Our earlier plan was supposed to have lunch at her place. But since I was rushing & Fara have no intention to go back to K.L with us, we parted our ways at UITM.

The whole trip will not be complete without any mishaps.. with me as the driver. (Sorry again mom). Somehow, I forgot to refuel the car and did not see that the fuel gauge was blinking. And for the 1st time in my driving life, we were stranded in the middle of the highway without fuel .... Arrgh!!! (and I was supposed to be rushing back for the appointment)

The worst part was I used my MyKad as T&G and there was no emergency number on it. :'( We tried to restart the car, managed a few kilometers and walla! Lady luck is smiling on me. We manage to reach the SOS phone booth. Called in for help and help came close to half an hour later in form of 2 reserved police & a tow truck.





Seeing all ladies in the car, the guys were extra nice to us. They towed us to the nearest exit, Kuala Kangsar. Bought petrol & help us to fill the car. And we went on our way. Chasing a group of Ferraris (or trying to)

Stopping in Ipoh again for lunch at Cili Hijau.. but this time my son came to meet us there. How I missed him so much!!! He took the trouble to rent a car just to have an hour or two with me. :'( Just want to hug him, but do not want make him embarrassed. I had to be contented just by laying my head on his shoulder for a short time and felt him kissed the top of my head. My heart stopped for a moment with eyes brimming with tears. I'm blessed with his love ... and my heart sang a happy tune all the way to K.L.

So, that is the story... I'll cherish till the rest of my life. Unfortunately, Yaya lost her camera and Nana's pictures was accidentally deleted for her smart card. Else, there will be more interesting pictures. Now, since I am no longer with Symphony, this will be the memory of my lifetime.

Thank you Nana, Yaya and Fara for making my life a little more interesting. Hope you girls will have a happy life and remember me.

Ciou!

Me and Solat Dhuha..

I once confided to my son that our life is not as before, when I was working in my previous company. I was earning quite a high pay, even though quite far from home but I still have my Sundays off, local holidays off, working hours from 8.30am to 5.30pm fixed. We used to have shopping days, eating out, movies, bowling & lots of spending money moments.

Turn of events in our family life left me without a job for more than a year, racking credit card debts, outstanding payment on my loans, doing odd jobs just trying to have enough to feed the family. Finally when I got a job, the pay is more than half less than previous, everything is so tight till I had to turn for help from my mother and other family members. Just imagine, a mother.. turning to her own mother for financial assistance, whereas I am supposed to be the one providing for my mother.. I was desperate, down & depressed .. not knowing where to turn to.

My son's answer was simple.. Ma, why don't you perform Solah Dhuha. InsyaAllah, Allah Al-Mighty will assist you.

I was stunned. How can that be a solution? Mind you, not to say I am not a believer, only my knowledge of my own religion is limited and I am still learning. So, I went to my online reference - in search of how to perform this solah and I found this.. which I will share with you.




I took up another reference, a book that was given to me a long time ago, but I have never had the time to look at it.. Perhaps at the time I feel I do not need it.

The book detailed to me on how to perform this solah, when to do this solah, what surah to read while performing this solah. After the niat, to read Al Fatihah and As Syams in the 1st rakaat and Ad Dhuha after Al Fatihah in the 2nd rakaat.

Again my limited knowledge hinders me.. I'm not even well versed in these surah. What if my sentences were wrong??

Allah s.w.t is Great. There is always another solution. Our beloved Prophet Muhammad s.a.w had said in his Hadis as told by (Saidina) Anas r.a, whoever perform the Solah Dhuha reading Ayatul Kursi 10x after Al Fatihah on the 1st rakaat and Qul Huwallahu Ahad 10x after Al Fatihah on the 2nd rakaat, he will receive acceptance from Allah s.w.t.

That I can do. Even though it took longer than the simple 2 surah, I have more confidence in these 2. And so I tried.




Previously, I had applied for financial assistance for my son's study and I had wrongly chosen his course. As such, it was rejected & I had to reapply. The process was so long that I had to use up whatever I earn for my son's monthly expenses for a few month. Alhamdulillah, the day that I 1st perform this solah, the long awaited financial help finally was credited to the account. On the same day, while driving back from work, my aunty called asking me to drop by to her house to collect payment for my previous work.

ALHAMDULILLAH ..

My son was right. Allah s.w.t will never fail to assist those who ask from him. For He is Al-Razzaq.. The Provider.


MISSING!!



Last seen Friday 01.10.2010. Goes by the name of CICAK. Long hair domestic. Male. 10 months old. Last location Blok 29 Bandar Tasik Puteri Rawang Selangor Malaysia. If anyone has seen him, appreciate if can shout out.

He is my 6 years old daughter's favorite and she missed him terribly. Have been looking out for him everyday but still could not find him.

Please help....

Whatever...

Ahaks!! So, polling does not help. Anyway, still thinking of what best to write.. :)

Polls

Okay okay.. I know this is lame but it is a good way to know what Bloggers would like to read. I do love to travel. However, current situations does not allow me to do so. I'll write based on my previous experiences and where I wanted to go. Since Malaysia is a diversified multi racial country, festivities are something we really look forward to. Books for me are old hand down books by friends & family or anything interesting that I can grab from flea markets & 2nd hand shops (do not expect new titles but I'll try my best). Pets.. (he he!) Mostly cats, turtle, hamsters, fish and anything that I can put my hands on and cuddle (except for the fish of course!) So, do take a second to answer to the poll and your wish is my command. Cheers!! :)

Now listening to...

I've been listening to this song lately and its close to the heart. Enjoy!


A new beginning

Hello there,

Welcome to my world. It's a fresh new start to this chapter of my life. I've been following others blog for quite some time now and I feel its time for me to start my own. This is a story of me.. may not be as interesting as other blogs.. but truly, honestly me..  Do bear with me as I struggle with words to express myself. Too much in my mind, I don't know where to start.

Hmm.. I guess I should start from the beginning... very briefly.

An army brat, moved around a lot, changed schools every two years, no BFF like some other people who are lucky enough to be in one place at a time, changed jobs as much as I've changed school, in and out of relationships which most of the time doomed for failure from the start but just too stubborn to acknowledge the fact, blessed with two most precious gift I can ever ask for in life, starting out a new life once again.. and hoped this will be the last.

That's the brief. I'll update again soon.. very soon. Till then...